Last week we went to the dentist. All three of us, but it was Wesley's appt. We have been seeing the same dentist every 6 months in the same office since Wesley was 2 and we really like them. They are kind, the office is inviting, kid friendly and everyone is so wonderful with both the boys. Wesley has never been a fan of the dentist. Really, I don't know too many people that love to go, but we do it. Because it's important. Last week for him was no different. I will spare you the details, just suffice it to say, things did not go well, there was a lot of crying, a lot of patience on the part of the staff, 2 out of 3 Hassmers left in tears and the afternoon called for a nap. For everyone.
Fast forward one week. I went to a consult with our pediatrician on Wednesday night. This is something I do on a regular basis to keep her up to date on all of Blake's appts with his specialists. It's just her and I in her office for hours after the clinic closes bouncing ideas off each other, planning, her explaining doctor terms to me and me getting a better idea of what's to come. I couldn't ask for a better pediatrician and friend. She really has been a blessing. Last night, I brought Wesley's serious meltdown at the dentist to her attention. She listened intently to all the details and then started asking me about other times he might show the same symptoms. I thought about it... and I came up with a whole list.
1. My sweet 5 year old has never liked getting his hair cut. The sound of the clippers frightens him. The moving of the chair frightens him. He cries.
2. The dentist has always been a scary thing. The chair leans back, the lights are so bright. The sound of the tooth brush is awful. Flouride makes his mouth feel funny. He gags.
3. He has NEVER liked any of those rides at the mall. You know, the 50 cent ones that you put your child on and then wipe them down from head to toe? He hates the idea that it would just start moving and he would have no control.
4. As a baby he never tolerated riding on David's shoulders. It was too high. too scary.
5. At 5 years old we have just recently come to a place where he is okay having his hair washed with a cup. Before now, there were always tears. Water in his ears, water in his eyes, meltdown.
6. "No, thank you" bites are a staple in our house. Every one tries something that we have for dinner. Wes is normally pretty good about this, but some textures just don't go over well. He vomits. And dinner is done.
We came to the conclusion together that he has a serious sensory problem. Sounds, textures, tastes, lights and movement have always been triggers for him and we are just now putting the puzzle together. These things scare him. They cause a type of fear that isn't normal for a little boy his age. These feelings of fear turn into anxiety and my strong, happy, tender-hearted pre-schooler is reduced to tears and shaking and worry. And I hate it.
At the suggestion of a friend and my pediatrician, I made a phone call today to have him evaluated at Children's Hospital of Richmond by an Occupational Therapist. If he qualifies for therapy, it would mean going to see them on a regular basis and through play, pretending, re-enacting, art and discussion they could give him some ways of coping with his surroundings when he feels scared, or anxious or concerned. We feel like it is a good idea to start this now so that when he is put into a Kindergarten classroom in September and is on sensory overload, he will have the tools to work through his anxiety should that happen.
Wesley is my normal kid. When people ask I always say that I have one special needs and one typical. I'm not saying Wesley has special needs and I'm certainly not labeling him with any type of disorder or syndrome. I'm just feeling all the feels that come with the realization that my "normal" kiddo, my baby, my sweet boy, may not be as "normal" as we originally thought. And that's hard.
